Meet My Muse

Saturday, January 07, 2006

How to mess with your coworkers, Part 2, and a Philosophical Observation

How to mess with your coworkers, Part 2:

Call up your program manager on her day off to invite her to lunch. When you get her voicemail, pretend to hack up a lung, feign crying, and tell her the deadline for the project from Hell has been bumped up to today. Proceed to tell her voicemail that you think you're dying, you have to go home, and you're sorry.

Then giggle hysterically, say, "just kidding!", and wait for her to open a big ol' can of whoop-ass, because you know you've asked for it. Keep your fingers crossed that revenge will be appropriate, and that you'll be graceful enough to take it well when the whoop-ass is finally served.

RE: How to mess with your coworkers, Part 1:

Mr. Honey and I went to a bar last night. This is normal behavior for a Friday evening. Halfway through the evening, I excused myself to Mr. Honey and made my way to the bathroom.

Upon entering the bathroom, I observed that the temperature in the bathroom was exactly 43.2 degrees lower than the temperature of the bar. (Note: the bar temperature is usually nipply in winter and suffocating in summer. Last night the bar was actually heated appropriately, for which I was very grateful.) When I had finished with my business in the bathroom, I had a ring of cold around my ass that stayed with me for quite a while. My companions were polite enough to not ask why we women were walking funny all night. Guess they didn't want to hear about frozen assets. Mr. Honey had that look in his eyes like it was a conspiracy to keep the women cold for the enjoyment of the men.

So, maybe it wasn't a coworker messing with the thermostat in the office the other day. Maybe it was something else.

Is it possible that all bathrooms are kept at exactly 43.2 degrees lower than the surrounding areas for a reason? And if there is a reason, what could that reason be (aside from the standard answer of horny men)?

Posted by Honey :: 12:36 PM :: 6 Comments:

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